A Hot Mess: Everything I didn't do in April
Sometimes it snows in April.
Dear Reader, as a self proclaimed hot mess and lazy girlfriend I hope you can forgive my tardiness with posts this month, post tour. As Prince once said -sometimes it snows in April (and in fact it is supposed to be snowing where I am in the Baltics this week). I have paused subscription fees for the time being while I get my act together and concentrate on releasing my next record -The Last Resort!
In the meantime I will give you all a little taster of everything I should’ve given you this month.
Last Resort: Advice Column
Discount advice for the desperate and disillusioned from the last person you should ask.
How do you overcome imposter syndrome when you know deep down you’re a smart ass bitch? Believe what you just said and know yourself, not the imposter syndrome. Take comfort in knowing that everyone aside from true egomaniacs (bless their blind faith - I respect it) also think they are imposters. We are all playing roles.
How can I look busy and do less work? I’m not sure if you want to deceive your boss -in which case the workload likely won’t change, so perhaps get better at getting it all done really fast -so you look busy AND have less work left to do -that seems logical. Or if you just want less work - quit. Find something more suited to your desired schedule, move to an Island with island time. Get busy doings things that aren’t work.
What should I name my future children? Dandelion, Cher, Madonna, Pavlova, Cake, Cookie, Babs, Valentino, Liberace, Leo, Adonis, Venus, Twinkle, Cherry Currie The II, Sandy, Shadow, Bam, Magnum, Glassy, Salvador, D’angelo, Cuckoo, Surf, Salon, Key West, Kokomo, Bahama, Dove, Nighthawk, Fern Gully, Pelican, Falcon, Valiant, Vamos.
Should I text her? I don’t think she’s interested but I tend to second guess these things? What have you got to lose? Why not? You never know if you don’t try. Romantic straight forwardness is always very attractive. We all like someone who knows what they want.
Disclaimer: The advice offered in this column is intended for entertainment purposes only. Use of this column is not intended to replace or substitute any professional, financial, medical, legal, or other professional advice. If you have specific concerns or a situation in which you require professional, psychological or medical help, you should consult with an appropriately trained and qualified specialist. The opinions or views expressed in this column are not intended to treat or diagnose; nor are they meant to replace the treatment and care that you may be receiving from a licensed professional, physician or mental health professional. This column, its author and it’s publisher are not responsible for the outcome or results of following any advice in any given situation. You, and only you, are completely responsible for your actions.
Hot Sounds
I’m extremely ready for a euro summer. Here’s some mixes I’ll be slamming.
Alongside my own mixes
Memoir Mondays
I have a a series of guests lined up for this year who are writing away. In the meantime, please read every Eve Babitz book there is -the reason I started this in the first place and thought it might be worth writing memoirs, and this personal essay I wrote about her ‘On Finding a Friend Who Knows What You’re Talking About’ for Talkhouse. I’d start with these two (controversial). Order and buy books from your local independent book store. Skylight in LA and The Broadway Bookshop in London was where I always seemed to end up buying books from on the prowl.
I would also highly recommend my mother’s book ‘Lovers Dreamers Fighters’ which will tell you almost everything you need to know about my origin story. It weaves the stories of some influential women in music, sex, art and all things wild and fabulous as well as the indomitable spirit of my creative powerhouse of a mother -who truly is a Lover, Dreamer and Fighter (for dreams and love). In that order.
Well, my friends, I’m wishing love and brazenness for you.
Speak soon. Send good thoughts, prayers, cash and whatever healing powers you have to all the people dealing with crazy bullshit in the world. Feel free to browse the archives for your reading amusement.
x
Holiday Sidewinder